So simple

I know 100% that Dr A DID made up his diagnosis of me being a high-risk suicide, BECAUSE if he HAD told me and the diagnosis was correct, he would have wasted NO time letting everyone know he was an exemplary Doctor. Instead he has refused to give FACTUAL answers. Medical Opinion. He caused all this.

How was I supposed to act having been told, by letter, I was a high risk suicide and ALSO that I was doing appalling Dentistry to such a low standard that I could be sued? And also I was breaking into tears in front of a patient and asking what I should do next. Medical Opinion. I say letter because a compliment slip would be pointless if we had talked face to face.

I knew I wasn’t suicidal although I did drive exceptionally fast (My main cars from 1975 were 2*MGB’s one a V8, Stage 2 tuned 250 bhp TR6, Ford XR2, Stage 2 tuned (chipped) Escort RS Turbo and Audio 80 Sports) and always have done so. BUT I did not remember breaking down in front of a patient although I did once or twice “have a rant at the world”, or hide in the X-Ray developing room or in the garage, after a CSA onslaught BUT I certainly knew what I was doing. The large number of patients STILL saying “Hi” tells me I was an OK dentist.

Or was I SO psychiatrically ill that I erased ALL those times from my memory.

If I was so ill why was I only told by letter? I had also received a letter from the ex-wife the same week.

Surely not telling a high risk suicide FACE TO FACE that he actually WAS a  high risk suicide AND SO bad at his job that he was probably going to be sued soon is the WORST POSSIBLE SCENARIO.?

What was I supposed to do at that time?

Go: Hey I now know what is wrong, I AM suicidal and crap at work. still never mind the Doc says I should be retired. I can sleep easy now. I have NO need to ask questions about where when why etc.

OR: commit suicide.

BUT I had seen a Private Psychiatrist that I assume (I still do not know for certain) arranged my stay in Heath House Priory and also I assume the payment for a six week stay. Again I do not know who paid for the stay. I asked many a time in hospital and the reply was “it is being paid full stop, no names”.

I HAD said “I wish I wasn’t here” BUT I MEANT I wanted to turn right instead of left when I left the practice and not go home.  ie Go on holiday, go stay with a friend anywhere but Neath. Have a break BUT I couldn’t because of the insurance delays and keeping my Bank sweet and happy. I rang them Mon, Wed and Friday at 13.00 to keep them informed. These were the problems. and the flood

BUT NOW I was confused about being a “high risk suicide” and couldn’t understand ANY of the work related stuff. I also was exceptionally busy socially and professionally. I had appointments pre-booked for 2-3 weeks in advance and was intending to continue working.

HOWEVER Dr A omitted to show the urgency in his retirement plans for me and caused ALL the appts from 12.00am 11th June to whenever to be cancelled with NO re-appointment. What do these patients do? They go elsewhere of course. Thus ALL the “goodwill” disappeared almost instantly. The price of a Dental Practice is mainly goodwill.

I was released from hospital 6 weeks later to this

ACTUAL ITINERY for the week 4th – 12th June 1998.

I received his letter, I assume from Sat 6th June onwards and I received this from my wife probably Sunday 7th June, by hand.

Thursday evening  4th June: In the Star Pub, Pen y dre Neath rehearsing the play we were performing on the 12th August 1998. It was my idea to do a Panto in the Summer about a “bad dream” where the pub, with all its characters and real ale, turned into a theme pub with disco etc etc  Myself and three others were writing the main plot with many regulars doing their party pieces. Worked 08.30 to 18.30

Friday 5th June: can’t remember, probably in town watching a band.. worked 08.30 – 16.30 11.00 to end doing home visits to care homes.

Sat 6th June: Rehearsed, in the afternoon, with the Band “The Conmen” I had joined as guitarist. And watched the pianist in a solo gig that night. worked 08.00 to 13.00

Sun 7th June: Saw my son and did “birthday things” as he was to be 14 on Monday. He stayed the night. no work

Monday 8th June: Went for a couple of beers in the pub to talk panto stuff and write rude jokes etc. worked 08.30 to 17.00

Tuesday 9th June: afternoon off to rehearse with the band. worked 08.30 to 13.00

Wednesday10th June: same as Monday. But also saw my son from 15.00 and he stayed over. The last time I saw him/spoke to him for 2 months. We didn’t even say goodbye, see you later mate.

Thursday afternoon 11th June: there was a dress rehearsal in my house and I could not cancel it. Apparently I was “not my self” (I had received the telephone call to go to hospital at 11.30 am) worked 08.30 to 11.30 should have been 13.00.

Thursday evening: I drove very fast up and down the A465 a few times and then went to the pub, telling no one.

Friday 12th June 1998: drove 95 miles to Bristol, to Heath House. I stopped for breakfast at Aust services, my head was in turmoil. 09.00 admitted to hospital and immediately on medication and 5 minute observations. I was told I was suicidal and had to give them all my sharp stuff and shoes, shoe laces I assumed. BLOODY HELL. I started asking about my practice and was told that ALL WAS BEING DONE FOR ME but I needed to know facts, it was my business.

I was discharged 6 weeks or so later to immediately discover all this.

Nothing had been done my Practice was destroyed. I was ruined.

I now had the problems I had had BEFORE hospitalisation and now some NEW ones, far more serious, and CAUSED directly by my sudden hospitalisation.

AND YET STILL NO SUICIDE 10 years on, even with no treatment or help or anything for 18 months despite me begging Dr A for help.

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One Response to “So simple”

  1. 4th and 5th rs Says:

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